How NOT to Hire: 'Keeping It Real' and Other HR Gobbledygook

You have to wonder about HR sometimes. I personally have worked in internal HR, and I know that HR professionals have to work hard to develop credibility with line, middle and senior management. Often HR is seen as 'that' department – a great big black hole of a cost centre that doesn't seem to offer a lot to the business on a day to day basis. Now, clearly this is not true, and a well run HR department can make a real difference to the success of a company. But sometimes HR just doesn't help itself. Take Cotton On (for example) with their HR policy that requires staff to 'have fun' and to 'keep it real'.

What the hell does keeping it real mean? Most of the time I see people using 'I'm just keeping it real' to justify being rude and aggressive. Keeping it real is as pleasant as 'I am sorry, but...' or 'With respect...' Worse, keeping it real means nothing at all to staff. If they require a definition of 'keeping it real' to ensure that they are, in fact, 'keeping it real', then they are no longer keeping it real, because they will be acting in a way to meet somebody else's definition of keeping it real, rather than what keeping it real should mean, which is 'being myself and saying what I think and feel regardless of societal guidelines or pressures'.

When you think about it; keeping it real is the most ridiculous, trite, worthless piece of HR gobbledygook seen in quite a while, particularly when you consider we live and work in the era of management speak. The problem with writing ridiculous policies is that it gives staff a licence to ignore EVERYTHING you say. But look, Cotton On is not the only company out there with ridiculous HR policies.

And, to be fair to HR, I think they are sometimes landed with these things. A company might decide they need an image overhaul, they hire some consultants to revamp the brand, and before you know it, management is demanding that HR insert ridiculous catch phrases into contracts and policy documents. I bet there are HR managers out there banging their foreheads on their desks in sheer frustration at the demand from management to include 'keeping it real'-like phrases in the company code of conduct. So maybe it's unfair of me to roll my eyes and snigger at more HR gobbledygook policies. Maybe HR is just trying to cope with the demands of David Brent style management.

But regardless, these kinds of policies can make a company look ridiculous. When you are trying to attract top talent, if you are sending out a contract full of ridiculous, unmeasurable, throwaway phrases, then you risk making a bad impression on a potential hire. It's hard to attract good people. It's hard to keep them. Keep it real, folks, and leave the trite, the meaningless and the ridiculous out of your HR policies and where it belongs - in bin 13.

Share this article

Useful links

Get in touch

Find out more by contacting one of our specialisat recruitment consultants across Australia, New Zealand, and the United Kingdom.

Contact us
Lisa Johnson • April 22, 2015

Recent insights

By Rachel Adams May 19, 2024
In today's dynamic work environment, flexibility is paramount. As the needs and expectations of the modern workforce continue to evolve, employers are increasingly adopting adaptable work arrangements to meet diverse needs and enhance productivity. In this blog post, we'll explore the significance of adaptable work arrangements and how they address the evolving demands of today's workforce while optimizing for search engine visibility.
By Hamish Lamberton May 12, 2024
In recent years, the rise of remote work has revolutionized the way companies approach recruitment. With advancements in technology and a growing acceptance of virtual communication tools, many organizations are now embracing remote recruitment strategies to attract and hire top talent. In this blog post, we'll explore how companies are adapting to virtual hiring processes and the strategies they're employing to succeed in this new era of recruitment.
By Esha Nischol May 8, 2024
In today's rapidly evolving landscape, automation is reshaping industries and transforming the way we work. While automation offers numerous benefits, including increased efficiency and productivity, it also presents challenges and uncertainties for the workforce. Understanding the opportunities and challenges of automation on employment is crucial for individuals and organizations alike as we navigate the future of work.

UK's 2024 Employment and Salary Trends Report

Salary trends, talent attraction and retention strategies

Have your say in the future of work
Share by: