The Dark Side of Secret Santa: Avoiding Workplace Holiday Drama

As the holiday season approaches, workplaces across the UK prepare for the time-honoured traditions that foster camaraderie and celebration, with Secret Santa remaining a staple activity in many offices. The tradition, dating back to Scandinavia, has evolved into a cherished event that allows colleagues to exchange thoughtful gifts in the spirit of festivity. According to a recent survey by a British HR firm, over 70% of UK companies include Secret Santa as part of their holiday celebrations, with budgets ranging between £10 and £20 per gift.

Despite its lighthearted intent, Secret Santa can sometimes stir up unintentional issues. For example, unclear guidelines or mismatched expectations can lead to discomfort or even conflict. Additionally, in an increasingly diverse workplace, it’s important to consider varying cultural practices, financial situations, and personal preferences. A gift that seems humorous or fitting to one person may feel inappropriate or exclusionary to another. As such, many businesses are now recognising the importance of establishing clear rules and offering support to make holiday activities enjoyable for all employees.

Furthermore, the rise of hybrid and remote work models has introduced a new dynamic to workplace celebrations. In some cases, virtual gifting or digital Secret Santa exchanges have replaced traditional in-person events. While this offers convenience, it also presents unique challenges in maintaining the festive spirit. These trends highlight the need for thoughtfulness and inclusivity in every aspect of workplace festivities, ensuring that all employees, regardless of their circumstances, can feel included and valued during the holiday season.

This backdrop sets the stage for a recent UK Market Update hosted by Liz Jones, UK Managing Director at people2people, and featuring Hannah Scanlan, Recruitment Manager. The discussion delved into the do’s and don’ts of workplace Secret Santa, offering insights, anecdotes, and practical tips to ensure a stress-free and enjoyable experience.

“It's a time to reflect on the year and build stronger bonds among colleagues.”

Liz Jones opened the update by underscoring the importance of inclusivity and thoughtfulness during workplace festivities. “Secret Santa is about spreading joy, not stress,” she remarked. “It's a time to reflect on the year and build stronger bonds among colleagues.” She emphasised the need for employers to foster an environment where all employees feel comfortable participating—or opting out—without any pressure. This reflects a broader trend of prioritising employee well-being and respect for individual preferences in the modern workplace.

Hannah Scanlan echoed this sentiment, highlighting the importance of clear guidelines to ensure everyone is on the same page. “The first rule is to set a realistic budget,” she explained. “Ten to fifteen pounds is ideal—not too extravagant, but enough to pick something thoughtful.” Setting a budget, she pointed out, not only levels the playing field but also prevents any unintended financial strain on participants.

The conversation moved into the nuances of gift selection, with both speakers sharing insights from their experiences. Hannah recounted a memorable moment: “I once saw someone receive a gym membership as a Secret Santa gift,” she said with a laugh. “It sent the wrong message and created unnecessary awkwardness. Stick to universal items like gift cards or festive treats.” Liz agreed, adding that overly personal gifts can lead to uncomfortable situations, even when well-intentioned.

For teams unfamiliar with each other, Hannah suggested keeping gifts broad and neutral. “I’ve seen great ideas like novelty items, festive food, or even pet-themed gifts for animal lovers,” she said. She shared a heartwarming example of a colleague who gifted a dog-themed Christmas hamper to a pet owner: “I've never seen someone so delighted over a gift. It’s about knowing your audience—or at least keeping it broad enough to avoid missteps.”

Liz also pointed out that labelling gifts is a small but crucial detail often overlooked. “It’s not uncommon to see unlabelled gifts left over, creating awkward moments where someone has to step in and redistribute them,” she said. “Make sure the person’s name is clear, so the exchange flows smoothly and keeps the magic alive.”

Another topic of discussion was the potential for creativity within the budget. Both speakers agreed that thoughtful gestures often leave the most lasting impressions. Hannah encouraged participants to consider practical or lighthearted gifts that align with the holiday spirit, rather than items that could be seen as critical or overly extravagant. “It’s not the Olympics of gift-giving,” Liz added with a smile. “A small effort goes a long way in creating a positive and inclusive atmosphere.”

The update also addressed common pitfalls to avoid. Alcohol, for instance, can be a tricky gift unless you’re absolutely certain about the recipient’s preferences. “Some people don’t drink for personal or cultural reasons,” Hannah explained. “Unless you know them well, it’s best to steer clear and choose something more universally appreciated.” Similarly, re-gifting was flagged as a potential faux pas. “Recycled gifts are usually obvious,” she noted. “It’s better to put a bit of thought into something new, even if it’s small.”

Liz summarised the essence of a successful Secret Santa: “It’s all about bringing people together and ending the year on a positive note. Keep it simple, thoughtful, and inclusive.”

Managing Your Workplace Festivities

To ensure your workplace festivities, including Secret Santa, run smoothly and inclusively, here are some practical tips:

Encourage Voluntary Participation
No one should feel forced to participate. Offer the activity as an opt-in and ensure that it aligns with everyone’s comfort levels.

Set a Realistic Budget
Agree on a budget that is affordable for all participants. This prevents undue financial pressure and keeps the event enjoyable for everyone.

Think Universal
Choose gifts that are broadly appealing and steer clear of overly personal or potentially sensitive items. Generic yet thoughtful options like gift cards, festive food hampers, or novelty items are safe bets.

Avoid Alcohol or Controversial Gifts
Unless you’re certain about the recipient’s preferences, avoid alcohol or gifts that could inadvertently offend. Instead, opt for versatile items that celebrate the season.

Label and Organise
Ensure gifts are properly labelled to avoid confusion or misplaced presents. A simple label can prevent awkward moments during the exchange.

Focus on the Spirit of the Season
Remember, the goal of Secret Santa is to spread joy, not create stress. Keep the emphasis on fun, festivity, and camaraderie rather than the value or scale of the gifts.

𝐅𝐢𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐣𝐨𝐛 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐈 𝐅𝐢𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐫𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐭𝐚𝐥𝐞𝐧𝐭
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